Vincent

Vincent is my granson, who is 12 years old, whom I have adopted. I love him a lot, and want to see that he gets a fair start in life, but like all parents, I worry.

Vinnie just went and got "World of Warcraft" to play on the computer. It is a live interactive medieval game, and you can join with you friend on line and explore this huge on line world. Vinnie about drove me nuts tring to get the game. At first I was against it because there is a subscription fee of $15.00 for two months. I could just see me getting stuck with the subscription fee forever.

At any rate, Vinnie traded in hix Game Cube and a couple of games for "World of Warcraft" and a couple of months of subscription, so it was something he did all on his own.

He installed the program when we got home from Oregon, and he is like obsessed with the game. He would spend his every available moment playing Warcraft if we would let him. His two chores are to take out the garbage and wash the dishes, but we have to pry his fingers off of the compter to get him to do them. He was getting so obsessed that I figured I had to set some limits, so I limited him to four hours a day, ending at 7:00. His bed time is 10:00 on school nights, so that gives him a couple of hours for friends and homework and chores. I figure that's pretty fair.

I had a Meatloaf sandwich and a drink at about like 8:00 last night and went to bed about 9:00, but the sandwich and the drink didn't get along, so I tossed and turned with heartburn until about 1:00. I finally got up and went downstairs to get some peptobismal at 1:30, and here is Vincent out in the kitchen. I asked him what he was doing, and he said "Getting a drink of Water", which wasn't exactly a lie, because that IS what he was doing at that exact moment, but I looked over and saw that the computer was loggong off, so I knew he HAD been playing Warcraft. When I asked him he readily admitted it, but what I really didn't like was the was he was sneaky about it. Anyway, his punishment is no more WARCRAFT for the rest of the week, to include the weekend. That also means he can't go over to his friends, because they would just play the game over there. Next time two weeks, a third time, and I will take the game off of the computer.

This isn't about playing Warcraft, it is about trust and boundaries. It is a parent's responsibility to set boundaries, and kids constantly test the boundaries. I guess it's almost a duty to constantly push the boundaries. It is a part of becoming an entity separate from the family. I sure don't expect a kid to grow up without getting into trouble, and as long as we deal with it straight up and honestly, we can get through anything. The real issue here is trust. Carol and I have to get to bed early (By 9:00) so we have been letting Vincent stay up after us, as long as he gets into the sack by 10:00. I guess we will have to curtail that, and insist that he go to bed at 9:00, when we do. At least for a while.